So what is this entry about? I'm not exactly sure. I think I just decided I should type something because I haven't in a while and I had a goal to post 2 posts a month. Even if they are just vomit on a page.
Since I finished my semester at school I've kind of been in hiding. First I got my wisdom teeth out, which was a wonderful time of forced rest. Oh yes:) Then I puppy/kitten sat for friends of mine, which was great company in silence and it made my heart be reminded of solitude, laughter at the lightness of life plus play time was a daily must! I also developed this sense of nesting in the midst of it all where suddenly I wanted to cook everything from scratch, clean redecorate, garden and I even bought some copies of house and home. I've never, I mean NEVER bought 'House and Home" magazine but for some reason I saw it and needed to have it. I'm not sure if this is a seasonal thing or if I'm growing up? Ask me again in a few months. Perhaps I was just learning life skills rather than just how to be a workaholic, hiring "specialists" for everything, which our culture so fervently encourages. Next on the agenda was getting a job. I contemplated taking a position up in Muskoka for the summer as I was offered a great space for free, unlimited boating and good money. However, my love for this city and the people in it caused me to turn down all the pros on my long list for those few short significant cons that kept me here! I am so glad that I have roots that do...
May was a HUGE marker for me. As of May 1st I had been living in 'the castle' for 2 years. This wouldn't be such a big deal except that since moving out of my folks place at 17 I wasn't in the same place for more than a year. The geographic area wasn't huge distances a part, it was just that I couldn't stand sitting still. Since starting a conversation with God (or should I say making it as a conversation since Him talking to me all these years must have been very boring without my response), I was challenged by our relationship to stay put for a while so that I could be present where I was, faithful in what I was doing and experience the beauty that comes with it.
This I have!
Toronto is where I was born, it's what I should get, where I my roots started but for some reason I couldn't reconcile that inside. It's even hard now, as I type this I wonder if it's where I will always be or if this is transitory. Either way, I have learned to be where you are whole heartedly and to give it your all even if the thought of leaving still plagues your mind. I am here and so here I will be!
I'm happy that wisdom directed me to this decision to stay because I am currently working at this adorable yet sophisticated space in the heart of the city called Hanks and the Wine Bar. Not only am I learning tons about good, sustainable and local food but I am also working with a dear friend that's become like a sister. It's only now that I see the glossy counterfeit that was being offered. I'm sure if I had taken the other position I would have been fine but fine is not what I'm after, best is where I'm headed! This is INTENTIONAL!
Again, still unsure of the theme to this blog. I guess it's more of a life update. I wanted to sit down and write something brilliant. To have some funny story with a whimsical life lesson but I don't. Not today or lately really. It's not that my creativity is stifled. At least I hope not...eek. I think I just haven't known what to say or how to say it.
I will say that the days are beautiful, the sun is shining in Toronto again, the birds are chirping and the butterflies are literally landing by my side.
Reflection:
I'm grateful to be here.
